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Nerveflit! The Ultimate Freestyle Poem
“Apr 23 2003, 06:55 AM”
today:
stomped my foot
and the ole hoot owl
just keep hooting
’99:
Poet is Priest
I’m confused clutter
-pour me a drink
today:
Sip my coffee
and aint no haiku
here. aint no!
’99:
Whisky breath –
New Years Eve
-forget me not
*
passionate –
brilliant
-you woe me & be gone.
*
Mondrian rhythms –
St. Louis art museum
-clos’d my eyes
today:
quicksand in your
teeth, grit in your
E Y E
’99:
tishmal –
dismal –
Jaded.
*
dharma –
karma
.randi.
*
Yugen –
Haiku
-ashes
today:
bury my foot down
yonder with my wounded
knee
*
stars yawn, my gut
picks up where it
left off
*
non response! void
is truth-untouchable:
attentive be the flame.
’99:
gray ghost voice –
anonymous tone
-long
*
pass the wine –
so full of cyn.
–
*
Under the arch –
Pornos seen from balcony –
-no where to hide.
*
Neal at the wheel –
Lonesome angel
-go back in time.
today:
Juxtaposing the heart: Are
you a sayer or are you sacred?
The junipers….
already know your name.
*
Immeasurable! Castrated.
No named. Being stoned
by heat. New light’s been
given; cling not.
*
One two three four. One two three four.
One two three four: when the #’s hit home:
Insufferable knowledge obtains dread
understanding; I must crush the stars.
’99:
“poor look now at the key
board is enough to make my
poor heart ache”
*
“here I am alive as any
other at five am, I my eternity”
“brilliant to pursue
drag down”
(paraphrased)
I know myself to be holy
light of vision! I will never
tell of You and Time.
today:
he Was dreaming, as I am dreaming,
as the universe is dreaming: and that
dream is real; and that dream will be
redeemed. Cold tide know.
*
fool to speak. fool to know.
fool by very definition- fool
is he that speaks- ignoring
definitions!
*
flamentersoft
flamexistslow
rollingodhamrarousestrangennuI s
ssssssssssss
ssssssssssssssssssssssss
ssssssssssss
ssssssssssss
ssssssssssssssssssssssss
ssssssssssss
ETERNITY: the stench
of crumpled currency
ETERNITY: a soft
pair of tits in you
mouth
ETERNITY: a little
flower underneath
you foot
FLAME: that which-is
eternal. that which- is
untouchable.
FLAME: a little
flower underneath
you foot.
*
innuendo
crescendo
window
essence is each
essence is a never
ending sentence
*
is! is… is! fuuu~
aint hills in the rain
aren’t! (wan Isms)
Henry Miller,
lend me your empty stomach
Anais Nin,
stay
Proust
make love to the clock
Jude,
rest now rest now
rest now
Hardy,
why not romance
the dawn
(squared poem
and tick tocked
the lively)
“but I have”
*
silent chambers of my voice
seethe
1980:
predawn Euphoric.
valium. scream. pimped. “i’ll come on
him and make him mine” “now I thee wed”
1984: let me tell you something. TEARS!
remonstrance. 100 ft tall no more!
“wove you”
hiding in the cellar
running in the woods
tearing in the pillow
waiting for the whippoorwills
to come. what good’s all this
now. to me. to anyone.
suicides a sweet reminder
that anything’s possible.
“couldn’t harm a fly,” he said
“how you gonna cut your wrist?”
“want to do it?”
“how transparent!”
“yes; but you don’t understand,
it’s already done. as well as
continuing. the rest is up to
angels, let us become.”
interior sketch:
beggin light with every twitch.
loving. six months deep
in decay. six months depth in
light. six months!? dove for four
backward- that original desire
predating birth. muscled, thin,
railed. self railed. all helled.
hell oh well is still Hell. all
is light; that is,
therein light.
speak soft,
learn what to remember.
DREAM:
a city where anything is possible.
a city decontrolling. relationships
everywhere decontrolling, bodies.
body. symphony. weakening.
BECOME!
don’t look back
when you get yor nex
chance boy; you’ll be
back in this room wif
this voice if’n you
don
but then
where?!
but then
what?!
sad sad mad glad
you’re a fraud, you’re a fake,
don know how to feel.
fuck you; and fuck me
for knowin.
*
you and you alone
idol tall &
beautiful
*
Sleepless.
Come, to better
know
I must…
when the clock
ticks, cry
I must…
let the power surge;
blow all fuses and laugh
in the fabulous light
at night
so bright
on a flight-
to here and back
HERE! where the blood
sleep, sizzles. HERE! were
nothing can be touched
with hands of real fools.
HERE! where nothing
matters except what-
is in starry night
this vision
*
visions aint this
visions aint that
visions cant stop
the rain; fission
cum wamin;
cold bowels
move slowly,
passing universal
gallstones
of your speech of your blather
of your never-ending debacles
I have only known one, once,
from afar, as perfection.
and perfection aint perfect either
perfection is heartbreaking once
you see it. perfection in imperfect ness.
that is, OF>
slicing your veins and sending
shocks through your memory
the vial is soft
only one knows the vial
there are many
a series of vials to choose
from. one is the right one.
conclusion is an impossible
manner of predilection
maya is everyone
discovery is a chance
opportunity
live for what you know;
and stop with these is’s ‘oy.
*
show me burnt corpses
show me dead children
I want to see them in your
office
on your floor
can you? can you look
back, retrace your steps
and condone what you
have done?
if you can, then i’ll
gladly dance over them
to get to your throat
or dance on out
we should have been
suffering inwardly long
ago
for every soul
suffering
ecstatic for life
ecstatic for no reason
*
the rest is static
*
goddess, in your imperfection
I see art- in your perfection
I see light like I have never
seen in the sky.
strangely it is hard
to come to grip with.
obviously I was put
here to see this.
as well as die.
I want to be the devil
that can remember
these revelations
eternally.
*
god, was not this
the same with you
and your son?
god, is truth sin?
ah, but I know the ego
is of the holy. and the
holy of your womb.
I want to pray to you,
I just want to pray to
you like the child I u s t
to be and remember that
I am still a child
(safe in the i-n-f-r-a-s-t-r-u-c-t-u-r-e
of your ego)
*
when I die, I will have
no need for these eyes.
they will have b e e n.
something will remain,
I will dance the wretched
dance, and
pay the price of time.
suffer the burden
of work. for now,
hot climates denied.
for n o w IS, opposite
to what I need.
I feel the fuses blowing
everywhere, soon there
will be something new
to complete this reality.
caw! caw! caw! caw! caw! caw! caw!
your seminal winds. your plastic doldrums.
neck muscles strain to meet the challenge.
tongue. in. pussy.
~puwsh.
~puwsh~
sky. in. window.
sky. in.
sky. out. day in. day thruout.
*
today:
thick honey;
& honey so thick,
you melt.
99:
slaves in the field
pickin cotton –
America’s forgotten
*
step up, reply truthfully;
blessed be your wandering
foot
*
blessed be your march
*
blessed be your home
*
blessed be your art
*
blessed be your students
*
blessed be your will
your way
*
blessed be your one handed
axe swing.
*
blessed be your blind love.
blessed even when I abhor
you for it.
*
blessed be your new found
tranquility
*
you end with you
and I end with i
sitting here sober
but high
*
let me make love to your pages
to your words, so beautiful I faint
and come alive again wither ever
realizing it; faint so faint so
soft
sof
sof
sof
thought; and fair Emily,
where is she?
observing the butterflies,
there she is; when I observe
the butterfly, there she is.
*
lounging in expectations
of others, cool dress on your
skin
****
musak
****
music
“‘lecTRick
body numb
body be numb”
small talk like a sweet candy
and a rose be dandy in yor
hair
shooting star, where are you tonight?
shooting star, I am thinking about you.
something inside me breaks! now and
I stop now, knowing not how your feel;
or if this universe of mine, this verse,
is of no concern- to not only you
but anyone. then.
well.
not under these stars.
&
zen fluidity weds
night
&
night weds
endlessly to streams
of thought whetting
appetites all around
&
rimbaud- what of him
hello-
“this inspiration proves that I was
dreaming.” oh yes, oh yes,
even you. a dreamer! frail!
radiant angel, your reality
is the only reality. there’s
a next dream (and the dream
was REAL); and in
between times, you’ve
creamed (certain
heaven)
figuratively.
otherwise,
assuming the ecstasies
of a poet; then the certain death,
re summoning
those visions. that only you
could know! only you
could howl your love
and K NO W!
arming
yourself against the
cold you know you
must now endure.
back to earth.
as ever
as ever
farethewell
*firewall brandishes
rubies
I am bitter
I am stranded
they write it off
i’d like to give him
a backhand in
return
or a kiss;
I DON’T KNOW
how to connect
the dots, how
how
tears will do no good.
she won’t care nor he;
perhaps, it is only I that
knows what I mean.
they are blind.
they carry gifts.
they’ve put the wrong
heartbreaks in the wrong
order; loving them all
the more, I jump
the ledge &
these waters
are cold
by degrees of self
overdose.
and the real saint,
will she be reduced
to tears in the end?
her bones crack
as she sleep
crack as I speak;
and I bleed, tho
there’s
nothing I can do
about that.
but rise from the
ash I will; and i’ll find
it hard to be bitter.
what irony is the life
within these bones-
things
always changing.
wood man’s last haiku:
ash scatters.
said i. haiku
is shapely.
“my axe blade.
that forest shade/
soft jade.”
*
so many thousand
of ways to say scatter
there never will be
an end.
oh so many words,
voices, chatter er, ladders,
soft in between’s and this’s,
hope>
soft underside of compassion
upside down or any way you like,
just words. they must end.
inspiration must die.
smoke vaporizes and leaves
a dry spell. a maple leaf.
a twig off a tree falls
on my chest as I
nap in the forest.
something to that.
to the ant scurrying
alone.
the little girl who
will one day be
a great dreamer.
and the boy a
ballerina. who knows?
*
balloons submerge
by force
*
you belong to the sea
I to the sun
*
expecting eternity
with all the strength
of all my colors
“Apr 23 2003, 01:07 PM”
exhaustive grace of
sparrow
sleeps…
lacing up the
moon with your
eyes;
narrow cat-like
slits, daylight
is recalled.
sparrow nests
in the clouds;
sound sleep –
pacing a dream.
“Apr 24 2003, 06:20 AM”
on your way
-know you are
w h I l I n w h I l I n
w h I l I n
bright
luminescent- like
star.
star shine, star be bright
star fall; window bend
*
unholy bent of
meadow
‘llowing runoff;
turning off the system,
with a flick of the fingers
ginger, turning up the flame
sprung and completed
competed with the broken
daffodils for room
birds, this
season;
reasoned
flit flits
hittin the wall
&,
crazed bravely,
grieving the existence
of- not even a feeling,
not a feeling
butterflies swarm the air
blotting on the sun
miraculously
&
then they are gone
&
we, here,
stand in our graves
with all this talk about
headaches, grief, thieves
in the night, and-
more of the same
as
we are swallowed under
wholly intact enacting
circus charades
here I am- see through. dreams destroy
dreams let the light in obliterating
any number of artifacts holy
or other
leaving jade-like ash ruin
to be groped and fought
over-
counting out a single lifetime
in seconds. pulse beat steady.
necessary. unraveling un
be came
be nimble
and broke
down smoking
the last cigarette
in the corner
howling
inanities at the wall
here and there,
heaven’s gate correlates
to his swallowed voice,
her sinister sister
purple robed
prowls; brown whiskey’d
veins; white flesh. faint
pink tint of cheek
heading out, and hitting
you up for one last
daydream while
surely winding
the sails.
sailor or a saint.
saccharine goodbying.
withered open withered closed
whit’d when came a rose
from out from under
burning up its immediate
surrounding, kindly.
and what of the chivalrous,
what of the stoned, what of
this one, zen koan’d; and the
dry
bones permeating
philosophy
from underneath
from inside
no Body allow this
but no un here
*
four to one
one second changes
the scene, and the scene
dissolving list fully
resoun!
resoun!
re sound
be quick,
reverberating mad.
got your last prophetic vision- first. sun.
first son.
panoramic bird’s eye view rambling on.
bird’s eye view in the sun, glaring laureates
of imageless number. kicking up crystalline
wineglasses while you can. told em your
soul and were burnt indifferently for the
fist thing, last. your lines just kept
getting longer and longer as your
headaches receded and the room
charms were all you had save your
name. you alone. you wineglass.
busting bubbles at the seams. pin point,
madding throbs, collective leaning.
sweat sacrifice. lazing in artificial
worlds, plucking up flowers, be
lazed forever and eternally
like an animal gleaming
in the sea-distance.
pithy. p-l-y.
invincible cities in the rain.
budding groves big and small.
shedding water with your fast
look-‘way.
from the scenery which
evades meaning. moaning in
ivory throne gutted of hunger
and ready for rest.
buzz of servants like bees-
the structure enlarges sadistically.
honey gold, the saxophone dissolves
in flesh-e notes.
a cool rain now splashing in brings
me back and shows me the foolishness
of my attempt, shouldn’t have been
attempt anyway, wasn’t before.
what happened to me- but I feel
m e again.
-if- now, I could only say a
thousand sweet things a million times
over in the lowest of tone, in this my
lowest of time, heartfelt and loving,
that too wouldn’t cure what I’m
feeling tonight. as if I didn’t have
a right to feel. time is the web, I must
submit and break its back, must ease
back and feel the peace and believe
in the impossible silently, never
rushing to words to specify.
(rain whimpers like a blessed
symphony of hearts a-beat)
“Apr 25 2003, 06:14 AM”
The sun-
a fiery-orange
nipple incinerating
angel-cries.
Priestess is fallen,
begging salvation
dully
She doesn’t care
She’s passing her time
till the rest of us
pass off into
the-
bright distance
Striking matches
with months agape
Actors in this, the continuous
play
teardrops in our clothe;
but eventually everything
gets left out in the rain.
and we rush to recover
blush to discover
a new day
on its way
or here already
waiting
on o u r way u-pup-UP
through heaven
praise Angels be soft
now, in that wan way
explaining sway
&
SWAY you will
and stay you may
*
trippin stone garden,
galloping footstep
*
Muddy indecision
like crazed sister
daylight overtaking
father Time
1,500 days and counting
1,500 dread moments unite
1,000 colors straight down
your gullet, drink ‘er hot
and gut your moans
impassioned & new
again
till then
till later when
you wake up,
stone blasted.
and breathing
choked, beg
everlasting
madness
so many ways to think-it
but only one way to shut
it out forever- his trodden
whiskey grunt, your
soft endowment
our strangled respects
mingling; bloom la
bloom, alas
room quicksands
pull at my consciousness
farewell for now
who know but that there’s
not fate and that that fate
be
gentle.
guiding.
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